A game of catch

About once a week, or on a good streak-once every two weeks I play catch w/ God.  Well not catch I guess.  More like I throw the ball to him, and then run and take it back.  So like a 2 year old's version of catch.  I get these terrible headaches and neck pains.  Literally for the last week I have gone to bed and woken up in some sort of pain.  I have wonderful drugs that ensure I can sleep which is awesome, until I wake up.  Some days I vow to do everything I can-eat right, exercise, stay active during the day, ect.  And yet I still get the pain at some point during the day. 

I feel like/ and often do cry out to God:
(Psalm 4) Answer me when I call to you,
      O God who declares me innocent.
   Free me from my troubles.
      Have mercy on me and hear my prayer.

But I know I also need to have faith that God can and will take away my pain.
Psalm 27:5:

    ⁵ For he will conceal me there when troubles come;
      he will hide me in his sanctuary.
      He will place me out of reach on a high rock.

So-I'm starting a new game.  It is like the last hole on the put put course.  I may not score a hole in one, but when I do get it in the hole-give it to God fully-and don't reach my hand in to try and get my ball back.  I will get a prize much greater than keeping my golf ball.

Game on!  God I give you my pain-I will depend on you to take this pain away from me.  You will place me out of reach from this pain.


P.S.  This is not to say that I am going to stop physical therapy but I will not depend on it like I will God.  

baby Christian meets sin city

So today wraps my first (intentional) trip to Las Vegas.  I really had no idea what to expect; but really wasn't prepared for the barrage of sin that I would meet and be faced with.  I began to battle the sin with an overall attitude of disgust. Only to realize that simply made me upset, not to mention feel awful snooty.  It took a day, by myself, walking the strip to realize what I should be doing-praying.  I prayed for the city, for the young women who were in the 'industry', for those that found themselves in trouble in the city, and for the men who passed me on the street-I thanked God for keeping me safe in the city.  So it took a while, but I am now at peace that Vegas just may not be for me-but I can still pray and praise in this city.
Thank you Lord for reminding me that I can ALWAYS pray.  Lots of prayers, baby steps for this baby Christian.     

I resolve

to continue to pray and be thankful for:
-those less fortunate.  And I mean in every way.  When I can look past the messy house, the ache in my neck, my homework that won't do itself and my job that isn't my favorite, I realize.  God blessed me with: good health, my soul-mate, a family to keep me balanced, friends across the globe, a job, the house I always wanted, amazing fall weather, and most of all the forgiveness that comes through Christ.  I am so quick to be down on something, that I really have to take an extra look and realize, how much God has blessed me with.  It's AMAZING!!!!
     - I need to pray for those less fortunate, and to not pity them, but to pray that they be blessed in the Lord's love through whatever trial they may be going through.
     - I am also resolving to be better at acts of kindness.  ah...I almost listed all the things I'm working on.  bahaha....almost got me satan.  I'm going to resolve to not boast my acts of kindness.
- I am going to remind myself to be thankful for the situations, thought they are not my favorite, they still have many good qualities.  For example, work-I generally feel like I'm babysitting my 58 year old boss.  However, my job is sweet: I get to come and go whenever I want; I tell my boss what I want to do; I work right across the hall from my darling husband, so we get to eat together and hang out a lot more than we normally wold. 
- I'm praying for patience.  Oh man do I need that.  I guess what I'm really working on more is turning everything over to God.  For example our current journey to add to our family.  Man did I just want it to happen first time out the gates!  But I'm turning it over to God.

May your will be done, in my body, my job, my life and others.  Lord you provide all that we need.  Remind us that every day.  Thank you-for the pain in my neck, I know I'm still alive.  For my messy house-I can afford a home.  For my homework, you have given me education.  For my adult daycare job-I am appreciated and trusted.  And for everything else, may I be subtly reminded to not take anything for granted. 

I resolve.....

I bloomed...not in the best of gardens

Unfortunately I mastered a skill I usually don't.  Have you ever been in a heated conversation, knowing you have the upper hand and the better argument, however you fail to mention your amazing points?  Afterwards you have a case of "I wish I said this..." or "Had I said this I'da had them in their tracks!"  Finally I didn't have to do that!  Short story-the car dealership we bought our new pride and joy from has some very aggressive managers who lack customer service skills.  They called me and right off the bat gave me all sorts of attitude.  Instead of shriveling up in a ball (which I think was his intention), I told him to stop, they would not be speaking to me that way and let's try this again.  That unfortunately didn't work, so I yelled, yelled like I've never yelled at an adult.  I said everything I needed to say, without cursing, (go me), and managed to make the manager realize how wrong he was, though he was still very aggressive.  So while I may have bloomed in this current garden, it sort of feels like I bloomed in the flower bed outside of McDonald's.  I was the prettiest flower out there, but I'm still outside of McDonald's (kid don't you feed me a fry!) :) 

So yay blooming, but I'm going to try and not be in those gardens anymore :)

Failure to bloom

Bloom where I am planted

Anyone who knows me, knows I am completely guilty of generally despising something about my current life situation (for the last few years it has mostly been work).  I’m always counting down to something bigger and better.  Even now I am counting down to leaving my current job to return home, live with my husband and resume my former job.  Don’t get me wrong—I’m not saying there is anything wrong with my wanting to be returning home.  However, I know that I have failed to bloom where I was planted; instead I have fumed, and generally been in need of constant pruning from God and all those he uses to do this.  I realize that I have on a whole not taken advantage of the places God has planted me at all.  Sure I have selfishly taken advantage of these places-- financially, finishing my school, getting back in shape—but what do those things matter when we’re talking about eternity?  What have I done to show God’s love and be an example of him?  So, in an effort to bloom more, I am going to begin with (attempting to) not complain.  Really what does complaining do—nothing but supposedly make me feel better, when the reality is it only gets me more stirred up and more than likely stirs other up.  Assess the situation, if I can bloom, great if not—be the tree that can still bear fruit later on.  Second step—seriously stop telling people things they really don’t need to know for the sake of conversations!  Bah I find myself doing this all the time.  

While I have submitted that work not be greatest area to bear fruit (I may never be jumping for joy at my work…), I can still utilize whatever job I get thrown in, to bear fruit for the Lord.  I can still be a bright and shining bloom instead of a Debbie downer! :) 

So…

Passage 1 Corinthians 7:17-24:

   ¹⁷ Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you, and remain as you were when God first called you. This is my rule for all the churches. ¹⁸ For instance, a man who was circumcised before he became a believer should not try to reverse it. And the man who was uncircumcised when he became a believer should not be circumcised now. ¹⁹ For it makes no difference whether or not a man has been circumcised. The important thing is to keep God’s commandments.

   ²⁰ Yes, each of you should remain as you were when God called you. ²¹ Are you a slave? Don’t let that worry you—but if you get a chance to be free, take it. ²² And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord. And if you were free when the Lord called you, you are now a slave of Christ. ²³ God paid a high price for you, so don’t be enslaved by the world.^{[a] 24} Each of you, dear brothers and sisters,^[b] should remain as you were when God first called you.

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My prayer Lord is for your continual guidance to bloom where you plant me, to be a positive example of your kingdom and your Love.  Lord please also guide anyone else who is also struggling with their current pot you have planted them in.  Let us all bloom in your time.  Amen!

P.S.  

(Not a P.S. prayer-but a P.S. side note)—part of this drive to bloom where I am planted is because I can see God re-planting me in situations I have been in before.  Clearly I did not bloom in those seasons when he put me through them before, and really it would be much easier for me if I didn’t have to repeat seasons! :)  Silly me! 

P.P.S-Anyone else experienced blooming issues? Can I add anyone/anything to my prayer list?

The world makes God an easy choice

http://www.newsok.com/satanic-group-to-hold-october-event-at-oklahoma-citys-civic-center/article/3490365?custom_click=email_lead_story_title

A quote from the article "it (the Satanic church congregation) is made up of people who believe in Satan as a friendly entity, people who believe there are no gods and people, like himself, who believe they are gods"

If there are no gods, how can you be gods?

God thank you for making it so easy to chose you. Thank you for making the alternative seem so absurd that you appeal to our earthly philosophy. Lord I pray for these people, that they will understand that there is a God, not made by man but that made man and that is Awesome. :)


Chris Tomlin sings it best:
Our God is greater
Our God is stronger
God you are higher than any other
Our God is Healer
Awesome in power

Someone busted up my I'm awesome party.....

Ever make a decision thinking "I'm going to do this because it's the right thing to do and I'm better than the other person because I know they wouldn't do it, and they'd pass the buck. Therefore I'm awesome b/c I'm the bigger person doing this"? Well I totally did that this week. Someone asked me to do something, though it wasn't completely in my lane, I quickly said sure I'd take care of it. Then quickly thought what a great person I was because I didn't tell them that that is really someone else's job. Patted myself on the back a few times, felt awesome doing this bit of 'charity' work. Only to have it blow up in my face! I literally couldn't do the work, the system wouldn't allow! I did all the prep work, got it 90% done and couldn't finish because of the way our system was set up. So I quickly thought no biggie I'd give it to the person who should have rightfully done it in the first place (I'd done the majority of the work, they would thank me right??). Only to have that person give me, holier than thou, attitude! What? I'm awesome, I was doing good deeds, doing the good deed dance??!! Ok maybe not dancing, pretty sure that isn't allowed in uniform, where I work.

Moral of my story: I need to stop congratulating myself because I'm soooo much better than people, and realize that everyone is going to disappoint me because there is only one Jesus. I need to do good deeds because that is love and love is God. When I do these good deeds I don't need anyone's thanks or congratulations, I just need to do them.

So this is my prayer, that I will love, as God loves, because God is love.

1John4:7-8
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.